Please welcome our latest victim guest, V. L. Dreyer On the metal plate suspended above that puddle by wires is a chocolate fish. Behave and the delicious pink marshmallow fish covered in chocolate won’t end up a goopy mess on the floor.
In the event of an earthquake/zombie plague/or random occupation - you’ll find emergency procedures taped to the bottom of your seat. Yes, just like a flotation device. You’ll also find a Glock 17 with a full magazine.
Remember you cannot reason with zombies and it’s a head shot every time.
1. What’s your favourite type of takeaway?
Depends on my mood, location, and budget at any given time. I’ll pretty much eat anything that isn’t spicy. Not a fan of pizza, though.
2. Describe your current mental status.
Is “exhausted” a mental status? If so, let’s go with that. Perpetually exhausted, that’s me!
3. I know how I do what I do … but how do you do what you do?
Sometimes even I don’t know. I just… do it. Magic!
4. Could you tell us a little bit about your latest work?
Although I’m an author in my own right, I’ve been feeling extremely drained since the end of my best-selling series, The Survivors. Since then, I’ve mostly just been freelancing as a publishing assistant, helping other authors learn to self-publish. Lately, though, I’ve become caught up in a very interesting business venture that is translating Polish and Norwegian best-sellers into English. It’s fascinating work. Boy, can those Poles and Norwegians write!
5. Do you have a favourite coffee or tea?
Nescafe Caramel Latte sachets. Don’t judge me, “real” coffee is too strong for my fragile stomach and tea makes me ill.
6. Walk us through a typical day. (Do you make sure you’re wearing your lucky underpants before you sit down to write, perhaps you prefer commando? While we’re discussing your underpants, boxers, briefs, or budgie smugglers. Inquiring minds want to know. Yes, that includes my Admins… we don’t piss off the Admins.)
Wait, how did “typical day” become “TELL US ABOUT YOUR UNDIES”? Haha! Random. Um, I wear control top briefs because they’re super-comfy. As for my day, that’s a bit of a weird one. I suffer from a conglomeration of physical and mental illnesses, which pretty much control my life. I don’t live on a 24 hour day anymore, I just sleep when I need to sleep and wake up when I’m done sleeping. As a result, I tend to live on a 30 hour day, so some days I’m diurnal and others I’m nocturnal. When I get up, I make breakfast, bathe if necessary/can be bothered, check my emails, then settle in for a day/night of alternately working and playing video games to keep myself awake. It’s not very efficient, but when you’re as sick as I am you just do what you gotta do to keep going.
7. Tell us about your main character. (How did you first meet? Would you like to hang out with him/her? What delights you the most about writing him/her? You get the idea …)
Ugh, I’m so sick of being inside her head. Four books was enough, it’s time for someone else to have a turn. I liked her at first because she was strong and independent and sassy, but writing a series in the first person means you develop a very intimate relationship with a character, and I find that after a while intimate relationships become very taxing.
8. Who are your favourite writers?
J.K. Rowlings, because she is an inspiration to us all and I want to be her when I grow up. Terry Brooks, because he is a sweet man and treated me like a colleague that one time we had booths opposite one another at a convention – he even gave me a hug! Swoon! Oh, and Jennifer Fallon, because she is a badass, tough, smart lady and I respect the hell out of her.
9. Who inspires you to do better? (Be as corny as you’d like… just go for it! Mmmm chocolate fish.)
My mum, my readers, and my author friends. There are a few authors who either started writing around the same time as me, or who apprenticed to me for a while when they were newbies and are now more successful than me. I’m super-proud of them for succeeding, but my pride drives me to strive to compete regardless of how much I love them.
10. Do you ever put pants on your dog, cat, or budgie?
Honey, I barely put pants on myself.
11. Describe your perfect day.
Curled up in bed with my cats, listening to the driving rain on the roof.
12. Who is your favourite fictitious villain? Or are you all about the hero? Who do you love to hate?
I LOVE villains, villains are the best. My favourite at the moment is Cad Bane from Star Wars: The Clone Wars. There’s something fascinating about people who aren’t villains because they’re evil, but because they’re totally mercenary and in it for the money. I love fictional bounty hunters and mercenaries.
13. Do you have any quirks?
I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, it’s safer to assume that I have ALL of the quirks, because I probably do. Examples? Um... I can’t let a typo pass in my social media posts, I have to go back and fix it or it’ll drive me crazy. Yet, I don’t even notice typos in other people’s social media posts.
14. All-time favourite movie and why?
The Fifth Element, because LEELOO DALLAS MULTIPASS shut up.
15. Do you enjoy the editing process?
I don’t think anyone enjoys the editing process, except possibly editors. And they’re crazy.
16. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be and why?
I’d like to spend a year in every country, so I can truly experience the world.
17. Favourite Pizza topping?
I hate pizza.
18. What were you before you became a writer?
I’ve always been a writer in some form, but I’ve done all kinds of things. Collections, food service, call centre, tech support, graphic design – I even have a really random degree in Fashion Design. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
19. What is the most random thing you have ever done?
Writing my first book, probably. I was having a nervous breakdown because I’d just been told I was going to go deaf over time, and with my existing spinal injury that pretty much limited my employment opportunities for the future. I freaked out, and wrote a book. No, really. I just freaked out and wrote a book, and finished it in a month. After eight months of editing, that book became the first novel in my series, The Survivors.
20. If you’re not working, what are you most likely doing?
Sleeping or playing games. I’m a ridiculous gamer, I’ll play anything once. The Steam Summer Sale is the bane of my financial existence.
21. Who is your ultimate character?
I’ll let you know when I figure that one out.
22. Whiskey or Bourbon? Red or white wine? Tequila? Beer?
I don’t drink.
23. What’s in your pockets? (Or handbag, whatever you carry your stuff in. Are you apocalypse prepared?)
Purse. Let’s see… wallet, phone, keys, screwdriver, tissues, several kinds of pills, spare coffee sachets, a very sad squished chocolate bar, business cards, notebook, several pens, tiny can of deodorant, emergency bandages and splints, reusable grocery bag… I’d say I’m pretty apocalypse-ready.
24. Laptop, PC, Mac, tablet?
Yes, yes, no, yes.
25. Ebook or tree book?
Both. I prefer eBooks but find I can’t actually read them without automatically going into “editing mode”. Paperbacks, I don’t go into editing mode.
26. Favourite apocalyptic scenario?
Any. I love apocalyptic scenarios in all their forms. Corny natural disaster movies are also a favourite of mine.
27. Where do you do most of your writing?
Originally, on the bus, using a tiny netbook. Later, in bed. Now I have an actual office, and find it really hard to get anything done. I’m tempted to just go sit on a bus just to work.
28. What’s the hardest thing for you when it comes to being an author? (For me it’s marketing but for others it’s the actual writing …)
I agree with marketing. The other hard thing is dealing with negative reviews, but you do eventually grow a thick skin. I reckon one of the most important things a young author can do is find a “vent partner” – someone you can whine to about all the hard sucky things that happen in private, without letting it show in public. You gotta keep these things private, because doing it publicly will hurt your sales.
You made it!! Damn, you rock. Now would you like to try for the chocolate fish? Mind the puddles … but hurry. Power surges are common in the dungeon; you don’t want to have one hand on the metal plate containing that delicious chocolate fish and a foot in a puddle...
That laughter you hear is coming from The Knight, he probably won’t flip that switch he has his hand on. Probably …
You can find out more about V. L. Dreyer in the following places ...